On Korean Thanksgiving Family Fun (Part 1) - Giving Thanks

In Canada, we consider Thanksgiving a time to stop and consider our blessings over the past year. It’s not a Korean custom, but I thought I would take the opportunity to give thanks for my soon-to-be Korean family.

I’m thankful that, despite their initial misgivings, his parents have been very supportive of our marriage once they met us. I have heard (and seen) more than a few disastrous situations where Korean families of bi-cultural couples went so far as to threaten to disown their children, or they stopped speaking to their kids for a whole year (despite living in the same house). Therefore, I am thankful that his parents have welcomed me into the family and given us their blessing.

I’m thankful that his soon-to-be 70 year old father is studying English in an attempt to communicate with me more fluently. Nobody asked him to do it…he started by himself and has now found a new later-in-life passion for language.

I’m thankful that my mother – a white woman in a 99% white English speaking village – has started studying Korean by herself. She has almost 0% chance of being able to practice with a real Korean where she lives, but she wants to be able to know both languages her future grandchildren will speak.

I’m thankful for my FI’s cousin, who despite having had her wisdom teeth taken out the day before, was able to carry on a perfect conversation in English that made me feel welcomed and part of the family.

I’m thankful for the amazing amount of vegetarian food my FMIL and her sister were able to make. Koreans love their meat, and despite having a traditional diet low in animal proteins, have embraced it fully in the past few decades. I know what I can and can’t eat here, and I am able to communicate my dietary restrictions easily in Korean, but I still often get dishes with hidden beef, spam, or chicken broth because people don’t consider these things ‘meat.’ However, despite the lack of cultural awareness about vegetarianism, his family members made a veggie version of a traditional 추석 soup, and a ton of traditional dishes without meat (or chicken broth, or fish sauce) just for me.

I’m thankful that his family kindly accepted my disastrous pumpkin pie…and that his nieces actually seemed to enjoy it.

I’m thankful that my soon-to-be Korean family lives in Seoul. That means we will never have to brave a 12 hour traffic jam to get to Daegu or stand on a train with an infant to get to the family homestead. We will always be able to ride an empty subway and then spend the rest of the weekend relaxing in a city that comes to a standstill over the holidays.

And finally…

I’m thankful for family in general. My Canadian family members have never been each other’s secret keepers, but parts of the family are close, and I grew up regularly seeing my grandparents and spending time with my extended family. Living in Korea for the past four years I have felt a great deal of freedom because of lack of family commitments, but also a great deal of sadness at being physically separated from multi-generational interaction. Family causes great burdens, but it also brings joy and security.

I am greatly blessed.